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Saturday
September 23, 2023


FIRST TIME AT PIG?
• What is PIG?
• Who is PIG?
• PIG's Doctrines
• PIG PLEDGE •
I Pledge Allegiance
To The Way Cool Dudes
That Founded
The Free State Of PIG
Because PIG Is The Place
That Gets In Your Face
Regardless Of
Gender, Orientation
Or Race
• CUPCAKE NATION •
Too many Cupcakes, Basement Boys and preciuos Snowflakes invading your Safe Space? You're in the very most, PIGish Safe Space.

>>> Cupcakes >>>

• AMERICAN INFIDELS •
Wake Up, Infidels! The F.S.O.P. Declares The Infidel Insurrection Has Begun.
>> Caliphate This >>
ODE TO
BLACK LIES MATTER

There once was a thug named Brown,
Who bum-rushed a cop with a frown,
Six bullets later,
He met his creator,
Then his homies burnt down the town

GRAMMY TIME!
Why Have Granola When You Can Have Some Grammy Tune In.
>>Grammy Time >>
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DON'T TREAD ON ME
Tired Of Our Sacred U.S. Constitution Being Used As A Snot Rag Like We Are? Click The Link, Read On And Be Right On.
>>> Right On >>>
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HAMBO FOR PREZ !
PIG'S GALLERY
 • PIG POLL •
MOONBATS
Which Moonbat Deserves A One-Way Trip To Their Very Own, Self-Imposed Safe Space?

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Michael Moore*
AOC
Cancel Cultists
Kam-Ala Harris
Greta Thunberg
Antifa
#BLM
ANYTHING FAUCI
LIZZO
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 *Due To Intergalactic Freight Costs, Tonage, Limited Food &
Oxygen Supply, Michael Moore
Counts As Two Votes.

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AND THE WINNER IS...
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>>> Read More >>>

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TOP STORY
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PIG ADVICE
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"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing, it was here first."
– MARK TWAIN

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They’re everyplace you go, and their numbers keep growing. They get on our last raw nerve, with their cacophony of caterwauling. We feel like grabbing them by the scruff of the neck, then bitch-slap some spine into them. We feel like screaming "Grow the f**k up", but we know it’s a waste of time, because they never felt the need to take responsibility for their own lives.

Who are they? They’re tragically familiar.

They’re pablum-swilling parasites who refuse to make the hard decisions about their own lives.

They’re the chronically-needy cretins who never outgrew that mommy’s pride and joy phase of an individual’s life. Age notwithstanding, they share a mindset with that tantrum-throwing tyke who won’t stop screaming until the screeching urchin gets whatever it wants.

They’re the ageless tykes who still eat their broccoli, because somehow - according to mom - it put food on the plates of starving children in China. It didn’t make sense THEN and makes even less sense, now, with Uncle Sam in hock up to his eyeballs to those far from starving Chinese.

They’re the obedient to a fault perpetual kids who always put on clean underwear, before venturing out of their playpen. We can’t shame ‘mom’ by getting caught in dirty underwear, when we’re in that accident which never seems to happen.

They’re the Bozo living in mom’s basement whose guilt-inducing wanking is so out of control, that he has a WEEKLY appointment with an optometrist.

They’re the feckless fools who base all of their decisions on America’s sanctified sob sister, Oprah, and/or America’s demented ‘daddy’, Dr. Phil. Think for themselves? Perish the thought.

They’re faux individuals who, for one reason or another, never accepted full, unconditional, responsibility for their own lives. It’s quite likely that they’re aware of the link between an individual’s actions and the ensuing consequences. They’re up to speed on the actions - consequences link. If they understand that consequences are the way life (that persistent pest objective reality) grades our actions/decisions, they don’t want any part of it. When it comes to this school of hard knocks, their fondest dream is an incomplete.

They’re so besieged by consequence phobia, that they, unquestioningly, follow the lunatic ravings of anyone who acts authoritative. They believe it, when a writer of bad science fiction, L. Ron Hubbard, blame all human problems on the room temperature spirits of long dead E.T.’s who were roasted in Earth’s volcanos. They’re eager to eat tasteless swill, when Food Nazis sell them a steaming load of transfats bashing crap. They willingly risk mercury poisoning, when some Globally Warmed Greeniac tells them Thomas Edison’s incandescent light bulb is killing polar bears.

They’re nothing but sheep who are frantically seeking a shepherd. If that’s what they want, they came to the right place. Shepherd Porcus and that rabid mutt, Hambo are up to the challenge. We can do ‘authoritative’ in our sleep, when it comes to giving free advice to the relentlessly clueless.

So, you've hit rock bOklahoma school hires drag queen that was allegedly charged for child pornography.

Oklahoma's education official is investigating a school district for employing a principal who faced charges related to alleged child pornography crimes two decades ago. Notably, the principal was never convicted of these charges.

"According to news reports at the time, those charges were dismissed by the court, and the record of the charges has been expunged," Western Heights Superintendent Brayden Savage said in a statement to the press.

Shane Murnan was hired by the Western Heights School District (WHSD) in June to be the principal of John Glenn Elementary School, at which time district leadership noted on its Facebook page that it had become aware of his past charges.

Oklahoma state Superintendent Ryan Murphy addressed his concerns on X (Twitter):

"The State Department of Education would have conducted another felony background check upon renewing his certification. Please know we are aware of the situation and handling this matter with the utmost attention and care. The greatest priority of Western Heights Public Schools is providing a safe learning environment for our students. They are our #1 focus."

Murnan was a classroom teacher at Little Axe Elementary School, a site of approximately 550 students within a small, rural district in central Oklahoma serving primarily economically disadvantaged children. From there, Muran moved to the much larger (approx. 32,000 enrolled), more urban, increasingly progressive and failing Oklahoma City Public Schools (OKCPS) district as a teacher, teacher trainer/instructional coach, and eventually assistant principal at Prairie Queen Elementary School.

ottom and find yourself between a rock and a hard place and life for you just sucks, huh?

Don't know where to turn for guidance, support, or a shoulder to cry on? Normally, The Free State Of PIG is the one, last outpost you DO NOT want to dump your personal baggage on, because, frankly, we don't care. But this week since you've found yourself here, we're willing enough and generous enough to dole out our pearls of wisdom for the sake of the PIGdom.

Mind you, this is not your Mommy's or Dear Abbey's advice column for the lovelorn.

What qualifies us to give out advice? First off, you came here looking for easy answers to life's consequence-riddled persistent questions. If that's not enough to seal the deal, there's the fun fact that our PIGish advice is FREE.

If you're here, never fear, the F.S.O.P. has a crack staff of dedicated professionals eager to help you overcome whatever obstacle life has tossed your way.

Our pioneering techniques go way above and beyond "tough love for the clueless."

We're not passing out hankies to those that cry on our shirts, nor are we prescribing anti-depressants for those that need a "Mother's Little Helper." Oh, you can forget us recommending daily doses of Oprah or Dr, Phil.

Actually, we hope to reach out and provide solutions for those everyday problems that seem to pester some people, like finances, kids, romance, the usual advice column questions with some not so usual approaches.

Your feckless flock of sheep needs your guidance, shepard Porcus:

Topic: Whining Kids

Symptoms: Stomping feet, loud mouth and all around crappy attitude with an "I want!, I want!" attitude? We've all seen them. They're wannbe Kim Kardashian's with the illusion that because they were born on third base, they thought they hit a triple...and dammit, life owes me.

Cure: A round trip ticket for an exclusive stay at Club Gitmo. That's right, parents. Watch in awe as all amenities (cell phones, vid-yo games and high top tennis shoes) and luxuries deprived, and little Biff and Muff are forced to...GASP...work for their keep. Talk about life's little boot camp.

You'll be amazed at the transformation of your once spoiled brat that actually had nothing but contempt for you as you paid his/her cell phone bill, into a much humbler, quieter model of a child.

Topic: Bad Drivers

Symptoms: We've all been down this road before, so no need to profile any Blue Hair Granny, Mascara Applying Working Girl or slant eye Sunday drivers.

They, without realizing what a road hazard they are, make everyone's day and daily commute THAT MUCH MORE MISERABLE by their mere presence on the road.

Cure: We realize that there really is no cure for the terminally, inconsiderate hinderances that clog our highways, but we may have the next best thing. We're proud to introduce as a substitute for that annoying middle finger in Kung Pao's rear view mirror...

Take a gander at this equalizer. It makes Mad Max look like a pussy. It's capable of keeping your sanity, and a safe commute by simply eliminating the four wheeled obstacle in front of you (note the guns) and making evryone's commute a little more tolerable.

Topic: Relations

Who says you need a social networking website like e-harmony, or I'm a desperate slut dot com to find the love of your life?

We have several levels of social interaction techniques, so you, too, can meet your soulmate.

For Men: Are you as attractive as a sun dried toad, wider than a wide load and a social outcast that just can't seem to find a way to break the ice to attractive ladies at social gatherings?

We have a sure-fire idiot proof method of getting you connected to the love of your life, at least for one night.

Simply walk into that party with a brand new crisp one hundred dollar bill taped to your forehead. When the cutie in the corner whose had her eyes on you and your Benjamin approaches, and asks, "What's the $100 bill doing taped to your forehead?"

After wiping the drool from your chin, do your best Cary Grant imitation and reply, "Well my dear, that, and many others are all yours if you take me home."

Works like the tried and true charm it is.

For Women: Find yourself aiming too high for Mr. Right and always coming up disappointed? Do you have a list of unrealistic qualities your future Prince Charming must have to be your perfect package? Do you eliminate certain prospective mates because they fail to meet all of your prima donna demands and, alas, you find yourself all alone, again on a Saturday night eating frozen cookie dough and playing with your pussy...cat?

Wake the hell up!!! Quit squawking, bellyaching and simply take a stroll down Reality Street. There, you won't find Mr. Perfect Income, Mr. Blazing Blue Eyes, Mr. Total Package and Daddy's Little Princess will find out she's not the goddess she thought she was.

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• PIG's Revamped News Page
Definitely NOT Your Mommy's News Page!
Get a PIG's-eye view of events.
Updated Any Time The News Is PIGish >>>
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• PIG's OINK OBSERVER
What the hell is it? If Enquiring minds
want to know, the answer is a click away.

>>> Oink Me, Big Boy >>>
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• HAMBO'S HAMMER
Have you been Hambo'd today? Every day, PIG's insane editor posts a sample of what's on his alleged mind.

Read More >>>

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GOSPEL: PORCUS PITCHFORK

• PORCUS PITCHFORK
'Fork Off! From time to time, whenever he's mad as hell and can't take it anymore, Porcus just says, 'Fork You
!
Read More >>>
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PIG'S POSTING SCHEDULE
PIG'S PIC OF THE DAY

• EYE OPENERS: Sometimes, A Picture Says It All! If You Have A Unique Photo, Cartoon or Graphic, Send It To: [email protected]
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OFFICIAL PIGEON PARKING SPOT
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Source: Cyberspace

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QUOTE OF DAY

“ ...so they may try to drive me to my knees, but that's where I'm the strongest" - Lauren Boebert, R-Colo,

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BOEBERTED (verb) The act of being escorted out of a theater for having your girlfriend play 'handies' with you" One step short of being Lewinsky'ed.
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#1: "We have the highest ethical standards of any administration in history." - White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki
#2: "Kyle Rittenhouse shot a sex offender, a domestic abuser and an armed Communist. This kid is only 17 and he's completed half my bucket list." - The People's Cube
#3: "Don't underestimate Joe's ability to fuck things up." - Boy Blunder
#4 “ Teach your sons how to be men, before their teachers convince them they're women." - Unknown
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Q: Now that Lia (Ex-Dude-But-Still-Not A-Woman) Thomas conquered NCAA women's swimming, what's next, the Special Olympics?

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TODAYS TASTY TID-BITS

Lauren Boebert Attempts To Smooth Things Over With New Line Of Purity Rings

Babylon Bee

FROM THIS...
...TO THIS???

RIFLE, CO - In an attempt to appease evangelical voters who were disgusted by her display of promiscuity at Buell Theater in downtown Denver, U.S. Congress-woman Lauren Boebert has announced a brand new line of purity rings.

"Celibacy is near and dear to my heart," said Boebert. "I just want to inspire a new generation of American youth to celebrate celibacy in style — and vote Republican while they're at it."

Voters in Colorado's third district, which Boebert serves as representative, remain divided on whether they're more upset by the highly publicized behavior that got their congressional representative thrown out of Beetlejuice: The Musical or the fact that Beetlejuice: The Musical exists.

"And it's popular?" asked local voter Edward Spiers. "Who's watching this thing?"

At a public town hall, Boebert once again apologized to her constituents for her behavior before pivoting to selling her new rings. "And I'm not only the designer, I'm also a proud customer!" Boebert told voters as she slipped the stylish ring on. "I hereby pledge to save myself for true love and marriage."

According to sources, Boebert then leaned over to an aide and whispered, "Is that what I was supposed to say?"

The purity ring collection, called Purity by Lauren, comes in 14k gold and is a Hobby Lobby exclusive.

*******

Drag Queen Spanks Burbank Mayor At Democrat Fundraiser That Teens Could Attend

"Thank You Sir, May I Have Another..."

The mayor of a California city allowed himself to be spanked by a drag queen at a fundraising event that minors as young as 15 were invited to attend, reports indicate.

Last Saturday evening, Konstantine Anthony, who became mayor of Burbank just last year, attended a drag queen bingo event in Venice to help raise money for Santa Clarity Valley Democrats. According to headliner drag queen Roxy Wood, the event was dubbed "Roxy's Got Balls!" and was marketed to those ages 15 and up. "Event not suitable for children," warned a promo shared by Wood.

At some point during the event, Mayor Anthony, grinning sheepishly, bent over at the front of the room and braced himself against a table while a drag queen in a low-cut, rainbow-colored dress swatted him across the rear end with a paddle, video from the event shows.

The famously anti-woke X account Libs of TikTok shared the video, which led to a social media spat with Anthony. During their exchange, Anthony initially claimed the drag queen bingo was a "private 21+ event" and suggested that Libs of TikTok was "lying" about it.

BlazeTV host Sara Gonzales then jumped in and noted, "Bro you literally just acknowledged you’re the one who lied. It was not a 21+ event."

In addition to the conversation on X, Anthony also commented on the Instagram spanking video. "Jealous???" he asked those criticizing or poking fun at him.

Anthony, a longtime member of the Screen Actors Guild and American Federation of Television and Radio Artists who spent 20 years as an improv comedian, entered politics in 2020, when he was elected to the Burbank city council. He served as vice mayor for two years before being appointed mayor in 2022.

Since 2019, Anthony has also served on the executive board of Burbank PFLAG — which once stood for Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays but which now bills itself as "the nation's largest organization dedicated to supporting, educating, and advocating for LGBTQ+ people and those who love them." He often lists his pronouns in his bios and also states that he is "#ActuallyAutistic."

Anthony, whom Red State called a "socialist gadfly" and a "low-rent Gavin Newsom," also defended the book "Gender Queer" on an episode of the WiseNuts podcast earlier this summer, denying to a concerned parent that it was "sexualized" content. He is currently running for a seat on the Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors.

 
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1920 "Say It Ain't So!" Chicago grand jury convenes to investigate charges that 8 White Sox players conspired to fix the 1919 World Series

1976 TV dama "Charlie's Angels" starring Farrah Fawcett, Kate Jackson, Jaclyn Smith debuts

1989 Hambo favorite TV drama "Baywatch" starring David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson debuts.

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GET YOUR SCOOP OF PIGISH POOP
If your Boob-Tube, News Nit-Wits or Social Media Meatheads aren't providing you with enough Caitlyn, Justin, Miley, The Donald, High Profile Race Hustlers
or anyone else that stops the presses and your world, well, OMG! and WTF! You're in the right place. Kulture Watch takes precision aim at anyone caught in our crosshairs and headlights and will give you, "The rest of the story." Read More >>>

IT TAKES BALLS TO PLAY IN THE PIGDOME
Do you feel entitled to the brass ring, blue ribbon, trophy or ring for merely showing up? Won't work here on PIG's field. Whether it's sports or any other form of competition, if you have the competitive spirit of a warrior and a PIGish sense of humor, click below for our newest Sports Section. Enjoy our cheerleading squad, pictured, we do!
Read More >>>

INVASION OF THE BORDER JUMPERS
For too long, America's borders have been a portal for the unwelcome, uninvited, undocumented, over diseased and crime ridden riff-raff and parasitic hordes. They swarm across our porous borders, from all over the world to pee, puke, spit and poop in our melting pot...and worse. Read More >>>

Google



CALENDAR

September is...
SLEEPY TIME
Month

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Shhh.
Don't Wake Him Up

"Let's Go Brandon"

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VETERANS

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Attention all Veteran's and Active Duty Military: PIG is cordially inviting all Vets, active or retired, at home or in Irak, to send us notes or messages for posting in PIG.

>>> Read More >>>
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• ZERO TOLERANCE •
• • • • • • • • • • • Amerika's Schools Are Being Transformed Into Orwellian Wastelands With All-Out Lockstep-Style Assaults On Free Speech, Expression, And Even Innocent Fun By Ivory Tower Eggheads aka Zero Tolerance Zombies
>>> Read More >>>
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• DUMPSTER DIVING •

NEED TO UP THE VOLTAGE ON YOUR SHOCK TREATMENTS?
THERE'S A B
ETTTER WAY.
GO DUMPSTER DIVING AND ENJOY PIG'S PRIVATE STASH.
>>> Read More >>>

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• SIGNS 'O THE TIMES •
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PISSED! POLITICALLY INCORRECT SIGNS SLOGANS & ENLIGHTENED DRAWINGS. TO PERUSE OUR COLLECTION OF OUT OF THE ORDINARY POSTERS, PICS & GRAPHICS. A REAL PISSER OF A PAGE
>>> Read More >>>
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• PIG'S PLAYLIST •
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PIG DECIDED TO TURN UP THE VOLUME MORE THAN A FEW NOTCHES BY UNLEASHING OUR PLAYLIST OF WHAT WE CONSIDER NOT JUST GREAT, BUT WAY INKORRECT TUNES.WE'RE SURE YOU WON'T EXPECT "RING AROUND THE ROSIES" OR "WE ARE THE WORLD'" MAKING OUR LIST. TO TUNE IN,
>>> Read More >>>
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• TOXIC TOONS •
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SICK OF DRABBLE AND DILBERT IN YOUR FISHWRAPS FUNNY PAGES? WELCOME TO TOXIC TOONS, HERE WE EXPLORE THE TOXIC SIDE OF TOONING AROUND
>>> Read More >>>

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• PIG PIN-UPS •
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IF YOU LIKE EYE CANDY, KEEP YOUR SHIRT SLEEVE NEARBY TO WIPE THE DROOL OFF YOUR CHINS. ENJOY.
>>> Read More >>>
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• TOE-TAGGED •
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NOTABLE PASSINGS
TO MOST, WE SAY FAREWELL. TO A FEW OTHERS, WE WONDER WTF TOOK YOU SO LONG.
BON VOYAGE.

>>> Read More >>>

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• FRIENDS OF PIG •
If you're ever in Las Vegas, and experiencing hunger pangs, and just have to have something hot, fresh and juicy, check yourself into:
The Heart Attack Grill
Tell 'Em PIG Sent You
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THE LIBERTY DAILY
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DR. HURD
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TODAY'S TOONS
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BABYLON BEE
FAKE NEWS YOU CAN TRUST
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KNOTTING KORRECTNIK KNICKERS SINCE 2004.
HOLY REALITY CHECKS, BATMAN!



© Copyright 1993-2023 PIG - The Politically Incorrect Gazette
Copyright © 1993-2023: All written, creative, design and intellectual material is perpetrated by and the exclusive property of T.D. Treat and P.K. Crowley. All original graphics are the exclusive property of P.K. Crowley. Permission not needed to beg, borrow or steal material from The Free State of PIG, just cite your source as http://www.pigazette.com, or a link to us as your source, and everyone goes to bed in one piece.