PAGE ONE PIG | TOP STORY | NEWS DIGEST | FEATURES


Friday
March 17, 2023


FIRST TIME AT PIG?
• What is PIG?
• Who is PIG?
• PIG's Doctrines
• PIG PLEDGE •
I Pledge Allegiance
To The Way Cool Dudes
That Founded
The Free State Of PIG
Because PIG Is The Place
That Gets In Your Face
Regardless Of
Gender, Orientation
Or Race
• CUPCAKE NATION •
Too many Cupcakes, Basement Boys and preciuos Snowflakes invading your Safe Space? You're in the very most, PIGish Safe Space.

>>> Cupcakes >>>

• AMERICAN INFIDELS •
Wake Up, Infidels! The F.S.O.P. Declares The Infidel Insurrection Has Begun.
>> Caliphate This >>
ODE TO
BLACK LIES MATTER

There once was a thug named Brown,
Who bum-rushed a cop with a frown,
Six bullets later,
He met his creator,
Then his homies burnt down the town

GRAMMY TIME!
Why Have Granola When You Can Have Some Grammy Tune In.
>>Grammy Time >>
• • • • • • • • • • •
DON'T TREAD ON ME
Tired Of Our Sacred U.S. Constitution Being Used As A Snot Rag Like We Are? Click The Link, Read On And Be Right On.
>>> Right On >>>
• • • • • • • • • • •
HAMBO FOR PREZ !
PIG'S GALLERY
 • PIG POLL •
MOONBATS
Which Moonbat Deserves A One-Way Trip To Their Very Own, Self-Imposed Safe Space?

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Michael Moore*
AOC
Cancel Cultists
Kam-Ala Harris
Greta Thunberg
Antifa
#BLM
ANYTHING FAUCI
 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

 *Due To Intergalactic Freight Costs, Tonage, Limited Food &
Oxygen Supply, Michael Moore
Counts As Two Votes.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
AND THE WINNER IS...
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
>>> Read More >>>

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

TOP STORY
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
REMEMBERING
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
Since the present is a train wreck and the future is such an unrelenting horror the FSOP seeks solace with some PIGish Nostalgia.
• • • • • • • • • • •

No matter where you live, the present is, at best, a train wreck. Admittedly our focus will be America, but that can wait, until we pinpoint a few international examples.

In Russia, Putin is working feverishly to return to the 'good old days' of the cold war, by putting the old Soviet empire back together. Ukraine is the latest to be invited back into the fold, by the Ruskie army.

Russia isn't the only one flexing its military muscles.In the Pacific, China is rapidly seizing control of large swaths of ocean. Kiss your ass goodbye Taiwan.

Let's talk nukes. That paragon of sanity, North Korea's Kim Jong-basement boy, loves playing with his nukes. If that's not thrilling enough for you, Biden handed the posterpunks for peaceful coexistence - the Iranians - nukes on a silver platter.

In Venezuela, Hugo "Skipper" Chavez is gone, but the damage he inflicted on his nation has the once prosperous country on life support. Hugo's successor, President Nicolas Maduro, has inflicted so much damage, the country is disintegrating right before our eyes and the pace keeps accelerating.

If you wonder what happens when a Socialist government imposes confiscatory taxes on a nation's wealthiest citizens, wonder no more. There's a nifty name for a nation that chases the movers and shakers, whose investments fuel an economy, out of the country: France.

The turmoil in Afghanistan is so far off the scale that even some no shit rational adults view Iran as a possible source of stability.

Here in the USA, we are being destroyed from within, by our own government:

* It is dismantling our military and rendering us defenseless.

* Our power grid has been mortally wounded by the EPA's murder of the coal industry.

* Any residual vestiges of no shit real education in government cess-schools have been purged by a blatantly anti-American indoctrination program named 'Common Core'. As vile as it is, there is something much worse. The new Korrectnik bully terrorizing the schoolyard is a whitey is evil gem called critical race theory - CRT.

* Because our demented POTUS refuses to enforce our immigration laws, the flood of border jumping scumbag invaders has become a tidal wave.

* Thanks to insane spending, and excessive regulations, our economy is in the crapper, a fun fact that spawned such 'lovely' things as an alarmingly low labor participation rate and insane fuel prices.

I could go on and on, but that's enough to make my point. The point, in this instance, is that life in 21st century may have its good points, but, in too damn many ways, it just plain SUCKS.

Since this suckage is impossible to escape, we do our best to cope. One popular coping mechanism involves trying to distract ourselves from the ongoing chaos. There are a myriad of high tech ways to attempt this, but it's a major pain in the ass to elude leftist lunacy that way.

Another way, the one employed for the remainder of this rant, involves remembering when things weren't this fucked up. For many no bullshit conservatives, their fondest memory destination is the Reagan presidency. For the Jackass Party moonbat, the memory destination of choice is FDR's presidency, the last time we had an Imperial President. In Mexifornia, Jackass Party moonbats got a so nostalgic for the late 70s (1975-1983) that they lured Governor Moonbeam out of his hippy commune themed assisted care center and made that senile twerp their governor again. Since then, Mexifornia took a walk on the wild side with the worse governor of all time Gavin the Terrible [Newsome].

Admittedly, those days of yore were replete with unresolved 'issues', but that's not our focus either. Our goal is to take that walk down memory lane, take it all in, then you can make your own comparisons to 21st century life and see if there's a way to resolve some of our annoyances with a blast from the past.

I remember...
Once upon a time schools were administered by adult individuals who possessed something known as common sense. Before it was hurled under the school bus, common sense was the gold standard where infractions of the rules were concerned. Since the line of demarcation which separated cool for school and uncool for school was much higher than it is today, suspensions and expulsions were relatively rare, thus making them stand out on an inmate's permanent record.

Since some readers might be unfamiliar with common sense, I'll explain how it worked. Common sense requires - gasp - thinking, an activity which is strictly forbidden, where Zero Tolerance is concerned. This thinking and common sense double-team means a back in the day school official would fit you for a straitjacket, if you advocated suspending or expelling a pair of grade school lads who perpetrated a 'shootout', at school, while armed only with finger guns.

I remember...
Once upon a time, cities were more user friendly when it came to an individual or individuals who had an idea, know how and determination, but were operating on a shoestring. What to do? In the 21st century, you'd probably be forced to seek investors. In that bygone period of time, the solution was very close to home. In fact, it was attached to the home: the family garage. That's where Apple built its first computers. That's where the founders of a major test equipment manufacturer, Tektronix, built their first batch of oscilloscopes.

From sea to shining sea, eager capitalists used the family garage to get their business started. How much have things changed? A few years ago, I read a story about San Francisco imposing Draconian restrictions on garages. Under a new law, the only thing you can have in garage is an automobile, nothing more.

I remember...
Once upon a time - it's probably hate speech to mention it - there were only two genders. I hope you're sitting down, because you're going to be shocked. You didn't get to pick your own gender. That was determined by specific biological factors. In general terms, girls had sexy bumps and stuff. A boy, on the other hand, was a testosterone ravaged horndog with a 'rocket' in his pocket.

In that bygone era, nobody gave a damn what gender you thought you were, or wanted to be. You were, of course, free to believe anything that thrilled you spitless, but it didn't matter. For official purposes, you were stuck with what Mother Nature assigned you at birth. Heartless brutes.

I remember...
Once upon a time, the land-line telephone sat atop the telecommunications foodchain. Making matters worse, there was no twitter, no text messaging. I know it seems horrible, but it's not as bad as it sounds. Being a very resilient species, we humans found other ways to communicate. I know what you're thinking, but the era I have in mind is before e-mail.

There was, at that time, a popular form of communication called 'a conversation'. It's still used by certain technophobes and nostalgia addled wingnuts. For those who never heard of it, it's a form of communication where two, or more, individuals - gasp - talk to each other using whole words and complete sentences. I suggest you grab something to steady you. Ready? Ok, here goes. Purists, who are afficionados of the conversation, insist on practicing this primordial ritual FACE TO FACE. Savages!

I also remember...
During the era when conversations reigned supreme, there was a special form of this ritual called the debate. In it's ideal [my view] form, only the topic to be discussed was pre-determined. Once the rhetorical bone of contention was set, a proponent for each of the opposing viewpoints was selected. Side by side on a stage, in front of a room filled with people, they would, after presenting their individual views on the topic, question each other. It was informative and very entertaining.

I remember...
Once upon a time, in the formative years of cable television, an individual channel's name was indicative of its programming fare. I know what you're thinking, but this isn't Hambo hyperbole, Doubting Thomas Sparky.

Does that mean what you think it means? Yup.

Do I mean the History Channel broadcast programs about history? Yup.

Does that mean A & E featured programming about Arts and Entertainment? Yup. They aired each of Shakespeare's plays (arts). They also aired a very entertaining series of the Nero Wolfe Mysteries.

Yes, that means MTV was dominated by - TA DA - music. I'll bet you never saw that one coming.

I remember
Once upon a time, before the Nanny State and the electronic babysitter sucked the life out of them, kids were free to squeeze every ounce of fun out of life. Ranging far and wide, they always found something to do. If they didn't have enough people for a regulation sport, they made up their own game. In that distant era, a parent's challenge wasn't getting Little Johnny or Moonbeam off the couch. The struggle was capturing their young 'uns when it was time to for them to come home..

A child growing up in that bygone era had it all. There were highs and lows. There were thrills and spills. Most important of all there was the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. Growing up had all that and more, all of which shaped an individual's character.

I also remember
There was a time when little girls were allowed to be just that, a little girl. They weren't tarted up in slutty clothes and hooker make-up, then put on display at a wenchlet pageant by a stage mommy who deliberately made baby girl a child molester's wet dream.

I remember...
Once upon a time the rank and file American had a much thicker hide. They knew the difference between colorful hyperbole and a deliberate insult and didn't set their hair on fire over either of them. Blessed with a robust sense of humor, they invariably laughed at the 'wrong things'. Afterwards, they might grin sheepishly, then laugh again.

I remember...
Once upon a time the IRS was a government cabal with one item on its agenda. If you're thinking that one item was rigging elections for the Jackass Party, guess again. In the distant past, their only function involved collecting taxes for Uncle Sam.

I remember...
Once upon a time an automobile was more than mere transportation, it was legitimate piece of art. They were motorized bling, before bling was even a gleam in a rapper's eye. In the late 1950's Ford Motor Company swam against the prevailing assembly line tide when it a hired skilled craftsmen to build the Continental Mark II by HAND. That's a work of art.

I remember...
Back in the day, one lowly dollar would pay for 3-4 gallons of gas. Now, that same dollar won’t even pay the taxes on a single gallon of gas. Thanks swamp rats. Why pay OPEC prices when we have the mother lode of oil right here at home?

I remember...
Once upon a time a real life hero named Jonas Salk devised a vaccine that eradicated the vile childhood destroying disease, polio. It was gone, and stayed gone, until disease-ridden Border Jumping Scumbag Invaders brought it back.

I remember...
Once upon a time the only twerp who wore a mask when entering an outpost of capitalism was a clown seeking a free payday and the infamy that goes with it. In these Covid-ravaged times you’re hard pressed to tell the crooks from customers. Thanks for that Fauchi.

I remember...
Once upon a time there were these repositories of books. No, I'm not talking about the Public Library, although they had those, too.. The book repositories in question had a collection of books that were for sale. It was a genuine thrill to pick up a book, leaf through it, even read a page or two, before you made your selection. The magical thing about a book store is the fact that the selection of books varied from one store to the next, depending upon the reading taste of the store owner.

Don't get us wrong, We the PIGs don't hate everything about the 21st Century. For example:

The Internet: For a scribbler like me, it's a time-saver. Instead of spending hours/days in the public library searching for some elusive facts, I can Bing my way to a cyberspace outpost which has exactly what I need. From noble to profane, cyberspace has it all. Its impact on you depends entirely on how you use it.

Skype: When I was working on a Module for the Austrians, Skype made the job much easier. Thanks to screen sharing, I could let them see intermediate test results, instantly. Without Skype, we would have missed our delivery date and they would have missed the NASA launch window for their instrumentation package.

DVR: My lovely bride would be lost without this extremely user-friendly miracle of modern entertainment technology.

We hope you enjoyed our blasts from the past. We the PIGs certainly did.

We now, with profound regret, return you to objective reality, where We the People are wondering: is there something worse than this




• PIG's Revamped News Page
Definitely NOT Your Mommy's News Page!
Get a PIG's-eye view of events.
Updated Any Time The News Is PIGish >>>
 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

• PIG's OINK OBSERVER
What the hell is it? If Enquiring minds
want to know, the answer is a click away.

>>> Oink Me, Big Boy >>>
 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
 
• HAMBO'S HAMMER
Have you been Hambo'd today? Every day, PIG's insane editor posts a sample of what's on his alleged mind.

Read More >>>

 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
GOSPEL: PORCUS PITCHFORK

• PORCUS PITCHFORK
'Fork Off! From time to time, whenever he's mad as hell and can't take it anymore, Porcus just says, 'Fork You
!
Read More >>>
 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

PIG'S POSTING SCHEDULE
PIG'S PIC OF THE DAY
• EYE OPENERS: Sometimes, A Picture Says It All! If You Have A Unique Photo, Cartoon or Graphic, Send It To: [email protected]
PERMISSION

Source: Cyberspace

• • • • • • • • • • •
QUOTE OF DAY

"If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking."
– General George Patton

• • • • • • • • • • •

WOKE (adj):
A state of awareness only achieved by those dumb enough to find injustice in everything except their own behavior.

#1: "We have the highest ethical standards of any administration in history." - White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki
#2: "Kyle Rittenhouse shot a sex offender, a domestic abuser and an armed Communist. This kid is only 17 and he's completed half my bucket list." - The People's Cube
• • • • • • • • • • •

Q: How come Joe Biden still has a vintage Corvette when he expects the rest of us to go EV?

• • • • • • • • • •

Happy St. Patrick's Day

An Irishman's first drink with his son:

While reading an article last night about fathers and the sons, memories came flooding back to the time I took me son out for his first pint.

Off we went to our local pub only two blocks from the cottage. I got him a Guinness. He didn't like it, so I drank it.

Then I got him a Kilkenny's, he didn't like that either, so I drank it. Finally, I thought he might like some Harp Lager?

He didn't. I drank it.

I thought maybe he'd like whisky better than beer so we tried a Jameson's – nope!

In desperation, I had him try that rare Redbreast, Ireland's finest whisky.

He wouldn't even smell it.

What could I do but drink it!

By the time I realized he just didn't like to drink, I was so drunk I could hardly push his stroller back home!

~ ~ ~

Irish Confession:

I went into the confessional box after many years of being away from the Catholic Church. Inside I found a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap.

On one wall, there was a row of decanters with fine Irish whiskey and Waterford crystal glasses. On the other wall was a dazzling array of the finest cigars and chocolates.

When the priest came in, I said to him,'Father, forgive me, for it's been a very long time since I've been to confession, but I must first admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be.'

He replied, You moron, you're on my side.

~ ~ ~

Some Light Dublin Traffic Humor

A car full of Irish nuns is sitting at a traffic light in downtown Dublin when a bunch of rowdy drunks pull up alongside of them.

Hey, show us yer teets, ya bloody penguins. shouts one of the drunks. Quite shocked, Mother Superior turns to Sister Mary Immaculata and says, I don't think they know who we are; show them your cross.

Sister Mary Immaculata rolls down her window and shouts, Piss off, ya little wankers, before I come over there and rip yer balls off. She then rolls up her window, looks back at Mother Superior quite innocently, and asks, Did that sound cross enough?

~ ~ ~

An Irish Blonde in a Casino:

An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland, arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty-thousand Euros on a single roll of the dice.

She said, I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely naked.

With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue yelled, Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!

As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed: YES! YES! I WON, I WON!

She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings (and her clothes) and quickly departed.

The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, What did she roll?

The other answered, I don't know - I thought you were watching the dice.

Moral of the Story: Not all Irish are drunks. Not all blondes are dumb. But all men... are men.

~ ~ ~

Mick says to Paddy: Close your curtains the next time you're shagging your wife. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday.

Paddy says: Well the joke's on them stupid bastards, because I wasn't even home yesterday.

~ ~ ~

Mick goes to the vet with his goldfish. I think it's got epilepsy, he tells the vet.

Vet takes a look and says, It seems calm enough to me.

Mick says, I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet.

~ ~ ~

Paddy spies a letter lying on his doormat. It says on the envelope: DO NOT BEND. Paddy spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick the bloody thing up.

~ ~ ~

Paddy was driving home, drunk as a skunk, suddenly he has to swerve to avoid a tree, then another, then another. A cop car pulls him over as he veers about all over the road. Paddy tells the cop about all the trees in the road.

Cop says For God's sake Paddy, that's your air freshener swinging about!

~ ~ ~

Reilly went to trial for armed robbery. The jury foreman came out and announced, Not guilty.

That's grand! shouted Reilly. Does that mean I can keep the money?

~ ~ ~

An old Irish farmer's dog goes missing and he's inconsolable. His wife says: Why don't you put an ad in the paper? The farmer does. Two weeks later the dog is still missing.

What did you put in the paper? his wife asks.

Here boy he replies.

~ ~ ~

Paddy's in jail. The Guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.

What the hell you doing? he asks. Hanging myself, Paddy replies. It should be around your neck, says the Guard. I know, says Paddy, but I couldn't breathe.

~ ~ ~

A tourist asks an Irishman: Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats? To which the Irishman replies: If they fell forwards, they'd still be in the bloody boat.

~ ~ ~

Finnegin: My wife has a terrible habit of staying up 'til two o'clock in the morning. I can't break her out of it.

Keenan: What on earth is she doin' at that time?

Finnegin: Waitin' for me to come home.

• • • • • • • • • • •


• • • • • • • • • • •

1756 St. Patrick's Day is first celebrated in NYC at the Crown & Thistle Tavern

1762 1st St Patrick's Day parade in NYC

1978 Cincinati Reds don green uniforms for St Patricks Day

1990 Daniel Patrick Crowley, aka Dodgeball, Porcus' only son, born

• • • • • • • • • • •
GET YOUR SCOOP OF PIGISH POOP
If your Boob-Tube, News Nit-Wits or Social Media Meatheads aren't providing you with enough Caitlyn, Justin, Miley, The Donald, High Profile Race Hustlers
or anyone else that stops the presses and your world, well, OMG! and WTF! You're in the right place. Kulture Watch takes precision aim at anyone caught in our crosshairs and headlights and will give you, "The rest of the story." Read More >>>

IT TAKES BALLS TO PLAY IN THE PIGDOME
Do you feel entitled to the brass ring, blue ribbon, trophy or ring for merely showing up? Won't work here on PIG's field. Whether it's sports or any other form of competition, if you have the competitive spirit of a warrior and a PIGish sense of humor, click below for our newest Sports Section. Enjoy our cheerleading squad, pictured, we do!
Read More >>>

INVASION OF THE BORDER JUMPERS
For too long, America's borders have been a portal for the unwelcome, uninvited, undocumented, over diseased and crime ridden riff-raff and parasitic hordes. They swarm across our porous borders, from all over the world to pee, puke, spit and poop in our melting pot...and worse. Read More >>>

Google



CALENDAR

February is...
#FJB
Month
• • • • • • • • • • •

FJB and the Corvette Hunter drove him in on
"Let's Go Brandon"

• • • • • • • • • • •

VETERANS

• • • • • • • • • • •

• • • • • • • • • • •
Attention all Veteran's and Active Duty Military: PIG is cordially inviting all Vets, active or retired, at home or in Irak, to send us notes or messages for posting in PIG.

>>> Read More >>>
• • • • • • • • • • •

• ZERO TOLERANCE •
• • • • • • • • • • • Amerika's Schools Are Being Transformed Into Orwellian Wastelands With All-Out Lockstep-Style Assaults On Free Speech, Expression, And Even Innocent Fun By Ivory Tower Eggheads aka Zero Tolerance Zombies
>>> Read More >>>
• • • • • • • • • • •
• DUMPSTER DIVING •

NEED TO UP THE VOLTAGE ON YOUR SHOCK TREATMENTS?
THERE'S A B
ETTTER WAY.
GO DUMPSTER DIVING AND ENJOY PIG'S PRIVATE STASH.
>>> Read More >>>

• • • • • • • • • • •

• SIGNS 'O THE TIMES •
• • • • • • • • • • •
PISSED! POLITICALLY INCORRECT SIGNS SLOGANS & ENLIGHTENED DRAWINGS. TO PERUSE OUR COLLECTION OF OUT OF THE ORDINARY POSTERS, PICS & GRAPHICS. A REAL PISSER OF A PAGE
>>> Read More >>>
• • • • • • • • • • •
• PIG'S PLAYLIST •
• • • • • • • • • • •

PIG DECIDED TO TURN UP THE VOLUME MORE THAN A FEW NOTCHES BY UNLEASHING OUR PLAYLIST OF WHAT WE CONSIDER NOT JUST GREAT, BUT WAY INKORRECT TUNES.WE'RE SURE YOU WON'T EXPECT "RING AROUND THE ROSIES" OR "WE ARE THE WORLD'" MAKING OUR LIST. TO TUNE IN,
>>> Read More >>>
• • • • • • • • • • •
• TOXIC TOONS •
• • • • • • • • • • •

SICK OF DRABBLE AND DILBERT IN YOUR FISHWRAPS FUNNY PAGES? WELCOME TO TOXIC TOONS, HERE WE EXPLORE THE TOXIC SIDE OF TOONING AROUND
>>> Read More >>>

• • • • • • • • • • •
• PIG PIN-UPS •
• • • • • • • • • • •

• • • • • • • • • • •
IF YOU LIKE EYE CANDY, KEEP YOUR SHIRT SLEEVE NEARBY TO WIPE THE DROOL OFF YOUR CHINS. ENJOY.
>>> Read More >>>
• • • • • • • • • •
• TOE-TAGGED •
• • • • • • • • • •
NOTABLE PASSINGS
TO MOST, WE SAY FAREWELL. TO A FEW OTHERS, WE WONDER WTF TOOK YOU SO LONG.
BON VOYAGE.

>>> Read More >>>

• • • • • • • • • •

• FRIENDS OF PIG •
If you're ever in Las Vegas, and experiencing hunger pangs, and just have to have something hot, fresh and juicy, check yourself into:
The Heart Attack Grill
Tell 'Em PIG Sent You
• • • • • • • • • • •

• • • • • • • • • • •

• • • • • • • • • • •
• • • • • • • • • • • • • •
THE LIBERTY DAILY
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
DR. HURD
• • • • • • • • • • • • • •
TODAY'S TOONS
• • • • • • • • • • • • • •
BABYLON BEE
FAKE NEWS YOU CAN TRUST
• • • • • • • • • • • • • •

KNOTTING KORRECTNIK KNICKERS SINCE 2004.
HOLY REALITY CHECKS, BATMAN!



© Copyright 1993-2023 PIG - The Politically Incorrect Gazette
Copyright © 1993-2023: All written, creative, design and intellectual material is perpetrated by and the exclusive property of T.D. Treat and P.K. Crowley. All original graphics are the exclusive property of P.K. Crowley. Permission not needed to beg, borrow or steal material from The Free State of PIG, just cite your source as http://www.pigazette.com, or a link to us as your source, and everyone goes to bed in one piece.