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Sunday
March 29, 2015

FIRST TIME AT PIG?
• What is PIG?
• Who is PIG?
• PIG's Doctrines
• PIG PLEDGE •
I Pledge Allegiance
To The Way Cool Dudes
That Founded
The Free State Of PIG
Because PIG Is The Place
That Gets In Your Face
Regardless Of
Gender, Orientation
Or Race
• AMERICAN INFIDELS •
Wake Up, Infidels! The F.S.O.P. Declares The Infidel Insurrection Has Begun.
>> Caliphate This >>
DON'T TREAD ON ME
Tired Of Our Sacred U.S. Constitution Being Used As A Snot Rag Like We Are? Click The Link, Read On And Be Right On.
>>> Right On >>>
'SKIN THIS!
Washington Redskins Owner Dan Snyder Has Proven Himself A True Warrior By Shrugging Off Korrectnik Thuggery. PIG Salutes ThIs Hero Of Inkorrectness For Standing Firm In His Decision To Keep The Name Redskins. Dan, You Are The Man!
CARD 'EM, DANO

Don't Give 'Em The Finger,
Because It Won't Linger.
Don't Bother To Sass 'Em
Just IDGAS 'Em
*IDGAS Is Our New " I Don't Give A Shit" Card.
When Confronted By A 'Tard,
Just Toss 'Em A Card
Click Below To Learn How You Can Be The First Kid On Your Block To Start Carding.
>>> Go Here >>>

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HAMBO FOR PREZ !
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PIG'S GALLERY
 • PIG POLL •
MOONBATS
Which Moonbat Deserves A One-Way Trip To Another Galaxy?

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Michael Moore*
Maxine Waters
Any Kardashian
Occutards
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 *Due To Intergalactic Freight Costs, Tonage, Limited Food &
Oxygen Supply, Michael Moore & Any Kardashian caboose Counts As Two Votes.

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AND THE WINNER IS...
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>>> Read More >>>

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TOP STORY
REMEDIAL OPPRESSION
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Oppression is a thankless job. We the PIGs think it's time to change that.

An oppressor's work is never done. It's a 7 days a week, 24 hour a day job that does not offer sick days or vacation time. The long and the short of it is this: wherever he is, whatever he's doing, and oppressor is always on duty. Given all that, why do it? First of all, it's a lot like the military draft in times of war. If you have the qualifications - unhyphenated, straight, white, male [white and male aren't etched in stone] - you're designated an oppressor by the Victimhood Vigilantes. Like the military draft, declining the 'honor' is not an option.

To put this all in perspective, we need to give you a quick refresher course on Victimhood.

Like most oppressors, I harbored the notion that entrance into the cult of victimhood was as simple as having the proper immutable characteristic. "Melanin rules!", I assumed, without overlooking gender, sexual orientation and non-racial ethnicity. This assessment isn't what Regis would call 'the final answer'. Biology alone doesn't guarantee your acceptance by the properly-hyphenated. It only designates your assigned group. To become a member in good standing of your assigned group, you must worship at the alter of your oppression. The mantra used by each proud new inductee is: "I am a victim. I am oppressed because I'm (insert group identity here)." Obviously, the key to admission into the properly-hyphenated legion is embracing your oppression.

Oppression is the foundation of a victim's new identity, but biology still plays an important role. It is the key element used to focus their hypersensitivity. All flavors of the properly-hyphenated share the common foundation of victimhood...the conviction that they are subjected to unrelenting oppression. However, a no-nad will have a much different set of sensitivities than someone from the taco clan or lotus clan. Only a no-nad will be able to identify the dread 'male look', for instance. For a taco or lotus clan dude, the male look wouldn't register on their oppression radar. This would seem to indicate the presence of fault lines along the boundaries of each victim group. Appearances, in this instance, are deceiving. Solidarity between the various flavors of proper-hyphenation is achieved by the notion that any act of oppression, no matter who is the specified target, is an act of oppression against all self-defined victims, regardless of the targeted victim's group affiliation. This means a taco or lotus clan dude could share a no-nad sister's outrage over the male look, despite the fact that it has no direct oppressive impact on them.

Another factor that binds the flavors of victimhood together is the relationship between oppressed and oppressor. This is a source of much confusion among unenlightened oppressors who assume that the removal of all oppression is the ultimate goal of the victim. Nothing could be further from the truth. The victim's self image is constructed on the bedrock of their oppression, meaning that the continuing presence of an oppressor is essential. Without regular infusions of oppression, the victim's very identity is threatened. Like a parasite, the victim's existence requires a viable host, in this case an oppressor...an active oppressor.

I know what you're thinking and it doesn't work. You can't escape your oppressor fate; they've set the bar much too high for that. The first line of defense, when oppressors stop being overtly oppressive, is to trick you into an overt oppressor reaction. One of the most successful victim-deployed trip-wires comes from the no-nads. It's as simple as trot out some hottie and wait for men to act like men. Another successful trip-wire is the Martin Luther King holiday/Black History Month double whammy. Fail to show what the melanin-enriched consider the proper respect for these twin trip-wires and voila, you're oppressing them. A very successful trip-wire, one that invariably produces a tidal wave of oppression, is the Gay Pride Celebration. The harder oppressors try to ignore the pink triangle crowd's freak-show antics, the more outrageous the behavior gets during these butt monkey, show and yell frolics.

The ultimate in oppression security involves the twin pillars of perceived oppression: institutional and unconscious oppression. Institutional oppression can be as simple as demographics. Should a given element of society have fewer members of one or more victim groups than their percentage of the total population, institutional racism. Should, on merit alone, one of the properly-hyphenated be passed over - the Academy Awards has been cited, numerous times - institutional racism. Should someone in a position of authority fail to appease the properly-hyphenated to the degree they desire...institutional racism. Since the rules are subjective, and dictated by notoriously fickle victim sensitivities, this one is nearly impossible to beat.

Unconscious oppression, a concept I like to call the 'holy grail' of oppression, is the most powerful weapon in the properly-hyphenated arsenal. This stems from the fact that unconscious racism is whatever the victim says it is. Any gesture, expression, utterance, or (perceived) thought can qualify, and there's nothing the designated oppressor can do to escape it. The notion at work here is that an oppressor, instinctively, outs himself, through some seemingly innocuous reaction or non-reaction. Unconscious oppression allows the properly-hyphenated to interpret virtually anything as 'racist', 'sexist', or 'homophobic'. "He didn't say anything objectionable, and his attitude seemed respectful, but I sensed the racism [substitute sexism or homophobia here, as needed] in his body language." Since objective standards or measurements are impossible, this kind of oppression is irrefutable. It exists wherever a victim perceives it. Eat your heart out, Catch-22! [Micro aggression, which is all the rage at Ivory Towers from sea to shining sea, is, in reality, just the unconscious oppression flavor of the month.]

Now that we're all on the same page, we can get down to business. Here, the Free State of PIG, we proudly, forthrightly, embrace our assigned oppressor role. Our cyberspace speed bump proves, to the most casual reader, how diligent we are when it comes to oppressing the chronically needy victims. We don't ask for anything in return, but we could. Here are a couple examples:

Siberian-Americans (Indians): We've all heard how the big, bad European settlers "stole their land." For the sake of conceding that debatable argument, let's say the Euro's did just roll up in their fancy ships and have a free-for-all with the Indians in the form of taking their land and stripping them of their tribal ancestry, etc.

We could call this one even [or we could demand reparations] because the Indians introduced the evil weed, tobacco, to the settlers, thus making the Indians peddlers and exporters of deadly tobacco products and even the dreaded "Second Hand Smoke" farce.

Added bonus for oppressors: the next time he lights up and a Smoke Nazi bellows about how second hand smoke kills, too, just blame it on a Redskin, because this time, it ain't our fault, right?

Border Jumping Scumbag Invaders [Illegals]: You lost the Mexican-American War and with it a sizeable chunk of what is now the American Southwest with the signing of the Treat of Guadalupe Hidalgo. To this day, groups like Aztlan, Mecha, and La Raza still cry foul over Mexico's loss and claim that areas lost in the war are currently "occupied" and want it back, reclaimed or reconquered. Since that won't be happening (not in our lifetimes) Mexico wants to reclaim their loss one illegal invader at a time.

Gringo has been more than accommodating by rolling out the red carpet in the form of FREE entry, medical, education, (bi-lingual, too) fancy prison digs, tax breaks and bonuses, etc. All of these perks and freebies are courtesy of Gringo, so instead of whining about perceived "entitlements" they ought to thank us on their way back to the end of the LEGAL immigration line.

WTF do we get? Nothing. Nada, unless you want to count cheap labor for so-called jobs "Americans won't do" along with attitudes of ingratitude. At minimum, we're entitled to a refund, but we'll hold off on that, for now. Why don't we call it a day and keep the land they sold to us and they agree to learn English, pay taxes and STFU or get the hell out.

Ivory Tower Eggheads: In 2015, an America college campus is the world's most hostile learning environment. It's a Marxist morass where every vile form of leftism is promulgated. Despite that, many heroic oppressors venture into that hellish realm to perform their duty on chronically needy victims in training. By rights an oppressor should demand hazardous duty pay, but he won't because he knows Moonbats only spend money stolen from someone else.

When an oppressor forces himself to objectify a hottie...when he reminds a Tranny that in biology, gender is more than skin deep...when he performs any assigned task, he doesn't want, or need, compensation. BUT, it would be nice if at least one of these pitiful pinheads said "Thank you." It's the least we deserve, for performing this public service.

Before I wrap this up, I'll admit that being an oppressor is the most fun you'll ever have with your pants on. Why? Why indeed.

All an oppressor needs to do to accomplish this mission is to exist. These "victims" are the ones who insist on interpreting your every word, action or thought (they're empowered by their hyphenation to read your mind) into blatant oppression. No matter how harmless, irrational or bonkers your prose or behavior might be, they will find a way to ferret out your hidden (even when it's "hidden" from you) intent. Anything you do is automatically racist, sexist or homophobic because they say so. In other words, they're determined to make themselves miserable without your help, just because you exist.

As fun as this effortless "because he's there" oppression is, I can Emerilize it - kick it up several notches - with "the stare". I discovered "the stare" by accident one day while I was in a shopping mall waiting for my lovely bride to return. As usual, I was "zoned out" into scribbler land and more or less unaware of my surroundings. I returned from scribbler land abruptly when I oppressed a passing hottie with an appreciative stare. That's when I noticed two melanin-enriched womyn glaring at me. When they departed, I heard one say, "Did you see the way he was staring at me. I just know he's in the KKK." Truth be told, I never even noticed them, but I did gloat over the fact that I had a new weapon in my effortless oppression arsenal. The downside to "the stare" is the fact that I can't summon the writer's trance when I really need it.

Another weapon that comes in very handy when you're confronted by a hostile "victim" is staying calm. When you remain cool, calm and collected while they bloviate, it will launch them into orbit. Best of all, if you can combine cool calm and collected with a grin, the effects are highly entertaining. As usual, you're having all this fun with little or no effort on your part, and the "victim" is providing you with a highly entertaining story to share with your friends and family.

The important factoid about the oppressor game is that anyone can play. If you're only a one star oppressor, "heterosexual" or "white" for example, that shouldn't stop you from having some relentless oppressor fun messing with some properly-hyphenated pinhead's mind. In fact, rational adults who are, by accident of birth, melanin-enriched or melanin-advantaged, have certain effortless oppression opportunities that makes a lowly three-star oppressor green with envy. It can be as simple as putting an Elephant Clan bumper sticker on your ride or letting yourself be seen reading Thomas Sowell or Walter Williams. If you're a female PIGster, then packing a Tammy Bruce book gives you unique, effortless oppression opportunities.

The properly-hyphenated pinheads - all self-defined "victims" - are determined to be miserable, so why not have some fun with it, without breaking a sweat. Don't just sit there Sparky, get into the game. On your mark. Get set. OPPRESS!


 


• PIG's Revamped News Page
Definitely NOT Your Mommy's News Page!
Get a PIG's-eye view of events.
Updated Any Time The News Is PIGish >>>

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• PIG's OINK OBSERVER
What the hell is it? If Enquiring minds want to know, the answer is a click away.
>>> Oink Me, Big Boy >>>
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• HAMBO'S HAMMER
Have you been Hambo'd today? Every day, PIG's insane editor posts a sample of what's on his alleged mind.
Read More >>>

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GOSPEL: PORCUS PITCHFORK

• PORCUS PITCHFORK
'Fork Off! From time to time, whenever he's mad as hell and can't take it anymore, Porcus just says, 'Fork You!
Read More >>>
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PIG'S POSTING SCHEDULE
PIG'S PIC OF THE DAY

Too true

• EYE OPENERS:
Sometimes, A Picture
Says It All.
If You Have A Unique
Photo, Cartoon or
Graphic, Sen
d It To:
pig@pigazette.com

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Image Source
PIGster Zykmel
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WORD OF THE DAY

IMPEACHMENT, n.

A political WMD which is supposed to intimidate an Elected Tormentor into playing by the rules, it has been exposed as a paper tiger by a Dumbo-eared narcissist who knows the Elephant Clan doesn't have the balls to use it.

Even if you had no source of news other than ultra-liberal MSNBC, that would be no excuse for failing to understand that Obama must be removed from office before he causes further harm.
– Dave Blount

Is Impeachment the only way to save us from that insane bastard in the Red Shed?

UpChucky

So what kind of leader is Chuck Schumer? He is among the very most trivial politicians to serve in that crucible of triviality, mediocrity, and dead weight we call the U.S. Senate.

No issue is too stupid or inconsequential for Schumer to weigh in on, inevitably calling for a ban or regulation that serves no other possible purpose than to shine a light on the glory and grandeur of Chuck Schumer.

If we are living in anything like a "Libertarian Moment"—that technologically empowered drive toward greater and greater control over more aspects of our lives and a period of increasingly individualized and hyper-personalized ways of living—Schumer has standing athwart history and yelling "Stop!" every second of the day, herniating himself in a mad dash to be in charge of everything everywhere. His efforts no doubt get in the way and slow down innovation, progress, and a truly plural society, but that he has so far been incapable of killing off the future completely is cause for celebration.

Here's a list of quickly ginned-up headlines of what our next illustrious Senate leader has been up to over his time in Washington. Add your own in the comments.

U.S. is urged to investigate cereal prices

Chuck Schumer rips e-cigarette makers

Sen. Schumer calls for ban on ubiquitous yoga mat chemical

Chuck Schumer races to extend ban on "undetectable" 3D-printed guns

Senator Charles Schumer Condemns Delicious-Looking Detergent

Schumer wants to ban high-powered green laser pointers

Sen. Charles Schumer Calls for a Ban on Powdered Alcohol

Schumer calls on FDA to ban powdered caffeine

Schumer Calls for Ban on Alcoholic Energy Drinks

Schumer Pushes to Shut Down Online Drug Marketplace

Senator Schumer Says Bitcoin Is Money Laundering

Charles Schumer wants federal probe into airline fare prices

Chuck Schumer Takes On The FAA Over Drone Rules

High-Frequency Trading Faces Challenge from Schumer

Fast-Food Bread a Concern, Schumer Calls for a Ban

Chuck Schumer: No Four Loko for You, New York

Senator Calls for 25 to Life [Video Game] Ban

Schumer wants to ban home-made bombs

Sen. Schumer wants to ban internationally produced Olympics uniforms

Senators Call For An End To Payday Lending By Banks

Chuck Schumer Engineers USDA Greek Yogurt Subsidy

Sen. Chuck Schumer to introduce bill 10 banning flame retardants from kids' products

Sen. Schumer: Ban Cadmium in Kids' Jewelry

All kidding aside, as a country we have a lot to be thankful for, a lot to be proud of, and a lot to be ashamed of.

And we have even more to be embarrassed by. Which brings us back to Chuck Schumer, our next Senate Minority Leader and a demonstrated foe of just about every possible innovation or reality that for whatever furshlugginer reason drives a bug up his ass. Including that time he called a flight attendant "a bitch" because she was enforcing a cell phone ban that I'm sure he's totally in favor of for everyone else.

If we have become an increasingly trivial country incapable of dealing with serious issues at all, much less in a rational and deliberate way, then we've really found our guy.

Blessed Are the Cracked, for They Let in the Light!

I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every damn minute of it.

Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them..

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck- is-the-room- spinning medicine.

God must love stupid people; He made so many.

The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up..

Procrastinate Now!

I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

Ham and eggs... A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

1638 There goes the neighborhood: Siberian-Americans bummed when illegal aliens settle in Delaware, keep grumbling about "those damn Swedes".

1848 Tennessee Tonnage blames Global Warming when Niagara Falls stops flowing for 30 hours due to an ice jam

1942 British cruiser named "Trinidad" fires torpedo hopes to hit something. Success! Torpedo nails a Brit cruiser named "Trinidad". "D'Oh!"

1969 Communist New People's Army found in Philippines; rumors that they worshiped a Dumbo-eared god persist to this day.

1984 NFL's Colts rewards its loyal Baltimore fans for decades of noisy, stadium-filling support by moving team to Indianapolis in the dead of night.

IT TAKES BALLS TO PLAY IN THE PIGDOME
Do you feel entitled to the brass ring, blue ribbon, trophy or ring for merely showing up? Won't work here on PIG's field. Whether it's sports or any other form of competition, if you have the competitive spirit of a warrior and a PIGish sense of humor, click below for our newest Sports Section. Enjoy our cheerleading squad, pictured, we do!
Read More >>>

INVASION OF THE BORDER JUMPERS
For too long, America's borders have been a portal for the unwelcome, uninvited, undocumented, over diseased and crime ridden riff-raff and parasitic hordes. They swarm across our porous borders, from all over the world to pee, puke, spit and poop in our melting pot...and worse. Read More >>>

STEPPING IN IT!
Get your weekly whiff as Hambo serves up a real steaming load to those thart merit this odiferous awad. It's OK to look. It's OK to smell. It's even OK to touch. But for those that have the misfortune of stepping in it, they get...A Steaming Load Award.
Read More >>>


Google


PIG CALENDAR

March Is
Requiem Month

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Progtards murdered America, may she rest in peace.
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VETERANS
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Attention all Veteran's and Active Duty Military: PIG is cordially inviting all Vets, active or retired, at home or in Irak, to send us notes or messages for posting in PIG.

>>> Read More >>>
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• ZERO TOLERANCE •
• • • • • • • • • • • Amerika's Schools Are Being Transformed Into Orwellian Wastelands With All-Out Lockstep-Style Assaults On Free Speech, Expression, And Even Innocent Fun By Ivory Tower Eggheads aka Zero Tolerance Zombies
>>> Read More >>>
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• O-CRAP! •

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Welcome to PIG's Outhouse, a new section that contains all the Obama crap that's been stinking up and overflowing our in-boxes. We had to create a new page because you have to actually earn a Steaming Load, and the folks running our Dumpster page don't want to lower their standards.
>>> Read More >>>

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• DUMPSTER DIVING •

NEED TO UP THE VOLTAGE ON YOUR SHOCK TREATMENTS?
THERE'S A BETTTER WAY.
GO DUMPSTER DIVING AND ENJOY PIG'S PRIVATE STASH.
>>> Read More >>>

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• SIGNS 'O THE TIMES •
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PISSED! POLITICALLY INCORRECT SIGNS SLOGANS & ENLIGHTENED DRAWINGS. TO PERUSE OUR COLLECTION OF OUT OF THE ORDINARY POSTERS, PICS & GRAPHICS. A REAL PISSER OF A PAGE
>>> Read More >>>
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• PIG'S PLAYLIST •
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PIG DECIDED TO TURN UP THE VOLUME MORE THAN A FEW NOTCHES BY UNLEASHING OUR PLAYLIST OF WHAT WE CONSIDER NOT JUST GREAT, BUT WAY INKORRECT TUNES.WE'RE SURE YOU WON'T EXPECT "RING AROUND THE ROSIES" OR "WE ARE THE WORLD'" MAKING OUR LIST. TO TUNE IN,
>>> Read More >>>
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• TOXIC TOONS •
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SICK OF DRABBLE AND DILBERT IN YOUR FISHWRAPS FUNNY PAGES? WELCOME TO TOXIC TOONS, HERE WE EXPLORE THE TOXIC SIDE OF TOONING AROUND
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• PIG PIN-UPS •
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IF YOU LIKE EYE CANDY, KEEP YOUR SHIRT SLEEVE NEARBY TO WIPE THE DROOL OFF YOUR CHINS. ENJOY.
>>> Read More >>>
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• TOE-TAGGED •
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NOTABLE PASSINGS
TO MOST, WE SAY FAREWELL. TO A FEW OTHERS, WE WONDER WTF TOOK YOU SO LONG.
BON VOYAGE.

>>> Read More >>>

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• FRIENDS OF PIG •
If you're ever in Las Vegas, and experiencing hunger pangs, and just have to have something hot, fresh and juicy, check yourself into:
The Heart Attack Grill
Tell 'Em PIG Sent You
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WWW.ARIZONABITEME.COM
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TEXAS FRED
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NATIONAL REVIEW
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FARK
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HOPE 'N' CHANGE CARTOONS
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LOCK AND LOAD
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WOODPILE REPORT
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STRANGE POLITICS
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HONOR 1778
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SAY NO TO P.C.B.S
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MISS RED MUSES
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KNOTTING KORRECTNIK KNICKERS SINCE 2004.
HOLY REALITY CHECKS, BATMAN!



© Copyright 1993-2015 PIG - The Politically Incorrect Gazette
Copyright © 1993-2015: All written, creative, design and intellectual material is perpetrated by and the exclusive property of T.D. Treat and P.K. Crowley. All original graphics are the exclusive property of P.K. Crowley. Permission not needed to beg, borrow or steal material from The Free State of PIG, just cite your source as http://www.pigazette.com, or a link to us as your source, and everyone goes to bed in one piece.