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Friday
May 29, 2015

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Wake Up, Infidels! The F.S.O.P. Declares The Infidel Insurrection Has Begun.
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Washington Redskins Owner Dan Snyder Has Proven Himself A True Warrior By Shrugging Off Korrectnik Thuggery. PIG Salutes ThIs Hero Of Inkorrectness For Standing Firm In His Decision To Keep The Name Redskins. Dan, You Are The Man!
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HAMBO FOR PREZ !
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PIG'S GALLERY
 • PIG POLL •
MOONBATS
Which Moonbat Deserves A One-Way Trip To Another Galaxy?

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Michael Moore*
Maxine Waters
Any Kardashian
Occutards
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 *Due To Intergalactic Freight Costs, Tonage, Limited Food &
Oxygen Supply, Michael Moore & Any Kardashian caboose Counts As Two Votes.

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AND THE WINNER IS...
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The "unalienable rights" with which you were "endowed" at birth do NOT include a right not to be offended. Living in a nation founded on inalienable individual liberty means you will hear things you don't want to hear. It also means you will see things you don't want to see
– PIG Doctrine


You're right, if you think this is one of those Top Stories. Our Dumbo-eared POTUS and his Obamunist Error seem to stir up that side of my imagination. From time to time, I need to vent, and this is one of them. Instead of focusing on a single, PIG-worthy matter, I will flog my way through a number of petty annoyances.

I've regaled you with things I'd like to see.

I've regaled you with things I'd like to hear.

Today, we'll explore the flip side.

We'll discuss things I'm tired of seeing.

We'll discuss things I'm tired of hearing.

I know what you're thinking, and you're right. 'Things I'm tired of hearing' begs the question, 'What about that freedom of speech stuff you're always touting, Hambo?' I freely admit that the lying rat bastards have that, too, but it doesn't mean I must 'suffer in silence'. I can, and will, hold their feet to the fire on the bullshit they're spewing.

Things I'm Tired of Hearing

Unwelcome Border Jumping Scumbag Buzzwords

I'm in one of those moods where tables will get pounded, any second now. It started with something I heard on the radio, while driving to Wonderland. They were talking about the 5th Circuit's ruling on Barry's amnesty antics.

The self-confessed Lib, Brian Whitman, kept using the Progtard buzz words "dreamers" and "undocumented". I shrugged off 'dreamers', for a while, but I wasn't getting it done, when it came to 'undocumented'.

If someone who doesn't have a driver's license gets in a car and drives off in it, would Whitman call him, her, himher, or it an 'undocumented' driver?

If someone flimflams the IRS for a large refund, using a fictitious identity, would Whitman call him, her, himher, or it, an 'undocumented' recipient? Does the same 'undocumented' recipient apply, when someone flimflams Social Security for which he, she, heshe, or it isn't eligible.

If someone robs a bank, is he, she, heshe, or it an 'undocumented' depositor/client?

If someone simply moves into an unattended house, does that make him, her, himher, or it an 'undocumented' homeowner?

Border Jumping Scumbag Invaders can call themselves anything they want, but they are still here illegally and need to GTFO.

"Dreamers" is the kind of feel good term that lefties find irresistible. In addition to giving them a 'warm fuzzy' feeling, it's intended to instill guilt in any rational adult who doesn't fall for that sob sister shit.

I don't give a rat's ass that someone's family brought their nipper [the dreamer] with them when they invaded this country. It sucks that you were born in a shithole country, dreamer Spaky. It sucks that where border jumping is involved, the border jumping 'sins' of the parents spill over into the dreamer's life. It also sucks that I paid the bill to educate your border jumping ass. It really sucks that you want more freebies instead of trying to 'resolve' your immigration status by leaving, voluntarily, then taking the necessary steps to return through the FRONT DOOR as a LEGAL immigrant.

Any individual is free to imagine any fantasy that thrills them spitless. I don't care if the wishful thinker is here legally or otherwise. Their 'dreams' aren't my problem, or my responsibility. It's their dream, their cross to bear. I'm not obligated to make their dreams come true. If I decide to assist them, it's because I choose to, not because I must.

"Living in the shadows" AND "Can't deport 11 million people"

First of all, it's 30 million, not 11 million. Furthermore, although I don't want them here, I don't give a shit about 'living in the shadows'. If we can't boot their asses out and they choose to live 'in the shadows', so be it. I only have one stipulation and it's non-negotiable: no freebies. No free medical care at the local emergency room. No schooling for their children. No government large$$e of any kind. They're strictly on their own. Is that clear, border jumping scumbag invader Sparky?

Assorted Other Tiresome Tidbits

"We Need A National Dialog On Race (Racism)"

This is what a dialogue should entail.

Dialogue, n.
Discussion directed towards exploration of a subject or resolution of a problem.

That two-way-street is what a dialogue on any subject should be, but it's not applicable when an Ethnocrat [any lefty] invokes it. For them it works this way:

When they preach their Ethnocrat,' it's all your fault', drivel, and your only authorized response is "Amen".

The least 'they' can do is be honest about it. Instead of dialogue on race, they should call it by its proper name: A Monologue on Race.

"It's for the children."

It's for the children is, without question, one of the most annoying phrases in human history. It's especially annoying when tyke protecting pests decide what's best for everyone else's children.

Lab coated hooligans are repeat offenders. Here, for your edification are two of the latest junk science whoppers they pulled out of their butts, to test our gullibility.

* Thirdhand Smoke: This is the new 'threat' hyped by the Smoke Nazis. 'Thirdhand Smoke' refers to minute smoke particles which land on carpets, clothes, etc. These minute particles are, these lab coated hooligans insist, especially hazardous to the health of THE CHILDREN.

* Secondhand Television: A USA Today news story defined this steaming load this way:

A growing number of researchers are warning about the dangers of watching TV when very young children are nearby. Recent findings suggest that even casual exposure to TV can harm their development and undermine parent-child interactions.

The most recent warning came last week when the American Academy of Pediatrics for the first time included warnings about "secondhand television" in its guidelines for kids under age 2.

In addition to discouraging screen time for young kids, it warned against watching TV with them nearby, saying the practice hurts their language development. It pointed to several studies, including one from 2008 that found background TV reduced the length of time they played and caused their focus on play to stray.

Secondhand TELEVISION? Seriously? What's next? Secondhand Transfats? Will they say, just seeing food with transfats in it will make Little Johnny and Moonbeam lard up?

"The Rich Don't Pay Their Fair Share".

If you watch any Capitol Hill Clown Posse debate about pending tax legislation, you're destined to hear one of the Demoncrat Elected Tormentors say 'it'. They'll launch a lengthy, high volume, self-righteous tirade about 'tax cuts for the rich' and spout bull crap that 'the rich don't pay their fair share'.

Whenever I hear that crap, it's, instantly, obvious that the bloviating Elected Tormentor - like all the class warfare punks in congress - thinks everyone's rightful property, including yours and mine, really belongs to the Nanny State. In their alleged minds, the Elephant Clan steals the government's money and gives it to the undeserving fat cats. That twisted attitude stands reality on its head, because, when you steal a guy's wallet then hand him back two dollars for bus fare, you're not giving him any damn thing. You're returning a small portion of the wealth that you stole from him.

A tax cut, by definition, goes to those individuals who paid taxes in the first place. According to IRS data from 2000, the top 10%, those with an Adjusted Gross Income at or above $92,144, pay 67.33% of all income tax collected. Conversely, the bottom 50%, those with Adjusted Gross Income less than $27,682, pay 3.91% of all taxes collected. 'Rich' Americans get the biggest tax cut, because they paid the most; it's as simply as that. [Given Obama's plunder the rich antics, the percentages are much higher, now.]

"The Science on global warming [secondhand smoke] is Settled."

You can call the whopper-crammed shenanigans perpetrated by lab coated hooligans a lot of things, but science isn't one of them. The governments to whom they whored themselves out gave the hooligans a simple directive: do whatever it takes to make your 'man causes global warming' gibberish sound scientific. It doesn't matter how you do it, because our press toadies will intimidate any rogue REAL SCIENTISTS who rat you out. The same crap was perpetrated by the so-called scientists who perpetrated the Secondhand Smoke bull crap.

Things I'm Tired of Seeing

I'm tired of the Nanny State - at all levels - creating a new problem, or exacerbating an existing one, by butting in where they don't belong. After getting things royally fucked up, they punish We the People with taxes, regulations and assorted other form of abuse, blaming us for their mistake. Mexifornia's ongoing drought is a prime example.

Several decades ago, wiser heads created a system of reservoirs and aqueducts which were used to store up water for future use, in the state's periodic 'dry' years. Egged on by Greeniacs, the state scuttled the system, then began flushing the lion's share of the rain the state does get out to sea, to 'save' microscopic fish - the Delta Smelt. It wasn't broke, but they 'fixed' it anyway. Now, they're pretending that they don't know how this predictable water shortage happened.

I'm tired of Jackass Party Commies who willfully destroy this once great nation to build up their voter base.

I'm tired of Jackass Party Commies who hate everything that made this nation a shining city on the hill.

– They hate rugged American individuals whose achievements are the product of their own intellect, hard work, and determination.

– They hate rugged American individuals who insist that what they choose to do with their rightful property is none of the government's business.

– They hate rugged American individuals who exercise their inalienable individual liberty, especially their freedom of speech, and their freedom to worship the deity of choice,

– They hate rugged American individuals who confront the fact that life is inherently unfair but it is not inherently unjust. The laws of nature are the same for everybody (Not unjust). But, since no two individuals are alike, when it comes to physical traits, intellect, and skills, results vary dramatically (Inherently unfair).

– They hate a nation founded on uninfringed liberty and a severely limited government.

– They hate America's success.

'Building the Jackass Party base' means achieving an equality of misery by turning America into a steaming pile of crap. They won't mind the stench, as long as they are the Caesars of Crap...the Turd Tsars.

I'm tired of Pachyderm Pussies who promise to restore sanity in government if We the People will put them in charge of both houses of Congress. It's all bullshit, because they don't do anything to reverse our mad dash toward tyranny. When you cut through the crap, you realize their real motive is this: It's our turn to sit in the BIG offices.

I'm tired of Boehner and McConnell grinning like fools, each time Barry makes them his bitches.

I'm tired of the MSM shoveling out Progtard propaganda and pretending it's hard news.

I could go on and on, but I'm running out of space. I guess it's time to wrap this up with some closing words.

I'd like to think all these things will change, but self-deception isn't my style. I looked over the horde of GOP POTUS wannabes and I'm neither impressed nor suicidal. I guess the second coming of a Reagan or Goldwater was/is too much to expect.

Is anyone else ready to split the country into an irrational half and a rational half? It may be our last, our best hope. Yes, I know, I'm even depressing myself. I think I'll blame it all on Kylie Jenner's chemtrails.

"We are fast approaching the stage of the ultimate inversion: the stage where the government is free to do anything it pleases, while the citizens may act only by permission; which is the stage of the darkest periods of human history, the stage of rule by brute force."
– Ayn Rand


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• HAMBO'S HAMMER
Have you been Hambo'd today? Every day, PIG's insane editor posts a sample of what's on his alleged mind.
Read More >>>

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GOSPEL: PORCUS PITCHFORK

• PORCUS PITCHFORK
'Fork Off! From time to time, whenever he's mad as hell and can't take it anymore, Porcus just says, 'Fork You!
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PIG'S POSTING SCHEDULE
PIG'S PIC OF THE DAY

Moron

• EYE OPENERS:
Sometimes, A Picture
Says It All.
If You Have A Unique
Photo, Cartoon or
Graphic, Sen
d It To:
pig@pigazette.com

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Image Source
PIGster SF
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WORD OF THE DAY

FOREPLAY, n.

Two minutes of boring affection that must be endured if you want to get to the good stuff.
[Official Dictionary of Sarcasm]

"This summer, we're going to have 16-year-olds, 17-year-olds, 18-year-olds who are looking for their first jobs. In Los Angeles, in Seattle and other cities. And they're not going to get them. They're not going to get them because nobody's gong to pay a teenager who is unskilled $15 an hour. plus benefits it's probably closer to $19 or $20 an hour, to train them. They're not going to do it because they're not worth it to the business. They don't want to go broke. They can only charge so much for a hamburger."

"The minimum wage destroys young people, their opportunities, their business experience, the ability to learn responsibility, to accept authority. The minimum wage is a disaster!"
– Mark Levin

How long will it take for LiLo to land in court again?

Swine Flew Sounds Off

The Department of Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julian Castro has called the Republican led continuing search for Hillary Clinton's Benghazi emails a witch hunt. Finally, a member of this administration I can agree with. This is definitely a witch hunt. Just because I like to help out where I can the witch was last seen wandering aimlessly around the middle of the country in a hippy van looking for something called the common man. No one is sure what will happen if she finds one.

In other news Witches Counsel Local 101 is filing a federal lawsuit against Julian Castro for hate speech.

As a final note there seems to be a rise, in the mid-west, of a new mental problem called hillary-phobia. It seems to cause otherwise normal men to cringe and hide every time they see a hippy van. Because of this there has been a request made to the National Weather Service to make a emergency upgrade to the software on the WSR-88 weather radar. As soon as practical a bullshit detection and alert system will be installed.

God bless our Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, and Marines.

More Swine Flew

I was going to write something clever about this

Kylie Jenner Has Questions About Chemtrails

but then, after reading it twice I realized my IQ had dropped 30 points and couldn't come up with anything. A perfect example of a negative intelligence field at work.

Don't Go to College!

John Stossel

[Reason] It's graduation time! Have we learned much? No.

College has become a scam.

Some students benefit: those with full scholarships and/or rich parents so they don't go deep into debt, those who love learning for its own sake and land jobs in academia and those who get jobs that require a college credential.

But that's not most students.

Half today's recent grads work in jobs that don't require degrees. Eighty thousand of America's bartenders have bachelor's degrees.

Politicians such as Hillary Clinton promote college by claiming that over a lifetime, college graduates "earn $1 million more." That statistic is true but utterly misleading. People who go to college are different. They're more likely to have been raised by two parents. They did better in high school. They'd make more money even if they never went go to college.

Economist Bryan Caplan argues that there isn't much evidence that college grads are paid more because they learned anything at college that is valuable to their jobs.

Getting into elite universities and graduating from them is mostly a "signaling" device, he says. It tells employers you're a smart person, so employers can begin teaching you things you really need to know. Employers, not the colleges, turn out to be the ones making students valuable contributors.

This suggests college is more like a hurdle than an investment. It would be better if companies found cheaper ways to screen for talent than four years of college.

Most of America's prestigious universities started out as training centers for the priesthood and ways of confirming your status as part of the upper crust. In many cases, that's still true today. Taxpayers shouldn't be forced to subsidize that. But we are.

Now President Obama proposes spending more of your money on "free community college." Senator and presidential candidate Bernie Sanders goes further, proposing "free tuition" at four-year public colleges.

Of course, "free" just means taxpayers are forced to pay.

This is nuts. When government subsidizes services, people supplying those services get wasteful. Colleges now spend millions on manicured lawns and fancy gyms.

A University of Missouri admissions officer bragged to my TV show crew about the university's "day spa" and said when it comes to recruiting students, "more important than reading, writing and arithmetic" is giving "our Tigers spring break every time they step into the student recreation complex."

I'm happy that Missouri's students like their luxurious gym, but I don't want to help pay for it. If the school thinks its "day spa" is crucial for recruiting, let them sucker their own alumni into making voluntary contributions for it. Leave taxpayers alone.

Government subsidies encourage students who don't belong in college to go anyway. Many don't graduate, feel bad about themselves and end up deep in debt. The subsidies also invite schools to increase the cost of tuition.

Democrats complained we need Obamacare because health care costs "were skyrocketing." But while the cost of health care rose 296 percent over the past 30 years, college tuition rose 553 percent. College is now a grotesque spending bubble, funded by government, that's about to burst.

Law professor Glenn Reynolds, author of "The Education Apocalypse," writes, "The rapid increase in college tuition began just about exactly the time the federal government started helping to subsidize college ... (Y)ou don't want to engage in subsidies that make universities more bloated and more inefficient."

But that's what Obama and Sanders propose to do.

A more compassionate move would be to warn people that college is not as valuable as colleges advertise themselves to be.

1849 On the day he gets patent for lifting vessels, Lincoln says: "You can fool some of the people all of the time, & all of the people some of time, but you can't fool all of the people all of time".

1864 Emperor Maximilian makes landfall in Vera Cruz to thrill Mexicans spitless.

1912 Humor-challenged capitalists running Curtis Publishing are shocked, shocked I tell you, fire 15 young women for dancing "Turkey Trot" during lunch break.

1919 Arthur Eddington confirms Albert Einstein's light-bending prediction.

1922 U.S. Supreme Court ruling exempts major league baseball from antitrust laws.

1953 Mount Everest's summit welcomes first visitors, Edmund Hillary & Tensing Norkay.

1975 Jerry Seinfeld's forbidden fruit, jailbait goddess Shoshanna Lonstein, makes world a more beautiful place. Hubba-hubba banner is up. Get over it.

1989 For one brief shining moment Lady Liberty rises above Tiananmen Square.

1994 Everybody panic! A great comet iceball is spotted above the North Sea. Sanity restored when it turns out to be Teddy The Swimmer in a Speedo doing the backstroke.

1998 Barry Goldwater, a real deal small government Republican, dies at age 89.

IT TAKES BALLS TO PLAY IN THE PIGDOME
Do you feel entitled to the brass ring, blue ribbon, trophy or ring for merely showing up? Won't work here on PIG's field. Whether it's sports or any other form of competition, if you have the competitive spirit of a warrior and a PIGish sense of humor, click below for our newest Sports Section. Enjoy our cheerleading squad, pictured, we do!
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INVASION OF THE BORDER JUMPERS
For too long, America's borders have been a portal for the unwelcome, uninvited, undocumented, over diseased and crime ridden riff-raff and parasitic hordes. They swarm across our porous borders, from all over the world to pee, puke, spit and poop in our melting pot...and worse. Read More >>>

STEPPING IN IT!
Get your weekly whiff as Hambo serves up a real steaming load to those thart merit this odiferous awad. It's OK to look. It's OK to smell. It's even OK to touch. But for those that have the misfortune of stepping in it, they get...A Steaming Load Award.
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PIG CALENDAR

May Is
Inkorrectness Month

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Be Wry, Let Fly, Make Progtards Cry.
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BEAT THE BITCH •

Her Highness has officially declared her plans to run for Presidency. If your as giddy as we are, tune into our attempts to pull her panstuits all the way down to the ground.
VETERANS
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Attention all Veteran's and Active Duty Military: PIG is cordially inviting all Vets, active or retired, at home or in Irak, to send us notes or messages for posting in PIG.

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• ZERO TOLERANCE •
• • • • • • • • • • • Amerika's Schools Are Being Transformed Into Orwellian Wastelands With All-Out Lockstep-Style Assaults On Free Speech, Expression, And Even Innocent Fun By Ivory Tower Eggheads aka Zero Tolerance Zombies
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• O-CRAP! •

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Welcome to PIG's Outhouse, a new section that contains all the Obama crap that's been stinking up and overflowing our in-boxes. We had to create a new page because you have to actually earn a Steaming Load, and the folks running our Dumpster page don't want to lower their standards.
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• DUMPSTER DIVING •

NEED TO UP THE VOLTAGE ON YOUR SHOCK TREATMENTS?
THERE'S A BETTTER WAY.
GO DUMPSTER DIVING AND ENJOY PIG'S PRIVATE STASH.
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• SIGNS 'O THE TIMES •
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PISSED! POLITICALLY INCORRECT SIGNS SLOGANS & ENLIGHTENED DRAWINGS. TO PERUSE OUR COLLECTION OF OUT OF THE ORDINARY POSTERS, PICS & GRAPHICS. A REAL PISSER OF A PAGE
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• PIG'S PLAYLIST •
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PIG DECIDED TO TURN UP THE VOLUME MORE THAN A FEW NOTCHES BY UNLEASHING OUR PLAYLIST OF WHAT WE CONSIDER NOT JUST GREAT, BUT WAY INKORRECT TUNES.WE'RE SURE YOU WON'T EXPECT "RING AROUND THE ROSIES" OR "WE ARE THE WORLD'" MAKING OUR LIST. TO TUNE IN,
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• TOXIC TOONS •
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SICK OF DRABBLE AND DILBERT IN YOUR FISHWRAPS FUNNY PAGES? WELCOME TO TOXIC TOONS, HERE WE EXPLORE THE TOXIC SIDE OF TOONING AROUND
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• PIG PIN-UPS •
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IF YOU LIKE EYE CANDY, KEEP YOUR SHIRT SLEEVE NEARBY TO WIPE THE DROOL OFF YOUR CHINS. ENJOY.
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• TOE-TAGGED •
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NOTABLE PASSINGS
TO MOST, WE SAY FAREWELL. TO A FEW OTHERS, WE WONDER WTF TOOK YOU SO LONG.
BON VOYAGE.

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KNOTTING KORRECTNIK KNICKERS SINCE 2004.
HOLY REALITY CHECKS, BATMAN!



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Copyright © 1993-2015: All written, creative, design and intellectual material is perpetrated by and the exclusive property of T.D. Treat and P.K. Crowley. All original graphics are the exclusive property of P.K. Crowley. Permission not needed to beg, borrow or steal material from The Free State of PIG, just cite your source as http://www.pigazette.com, or a link to us as your source, and everyone goes to bed in one piece.